Bittersweet
And there it came, all of the sudden. The wave of emotion. Quite unexpectedly it lurked behind the sms. And bang - it rolled over me. This did not happen for quite a while now and it surprises me, how it made me sad. The sadness came in out of the blue. I think of the text from Elaine about feeling emotions. Maybe that's why I'm vulnerable to the moment, because I've been thinking a lot about feeling feelings the last few days. Yes, sometimes I put in a big box and try to hide that in the far corner of my selenium life. I am strong! I can enjoy the moment! There are so many other things and qualities in life that I would not have had if I had become a mother. I try to make my inner self big, I stamp my feet firmly on the ground inside and puff myself up. Who wants something from me? I am superwomen, I am strong and happy! And then, when the moment seems so unobserved, just like just now, when the sms fluttered in and my soul bird waves with its hands and says “Hell